


though my mind could think i still was a madman

by kirael



Series: one-shots [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Hallucinations, Mental Institutions, Season/Series 07
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-08
Updated: 2015-08-08
Packaged: 2018-04-13 13:55:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4524534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirael/pseuds/kirael
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When you're Sam Winchester, falling takes a long time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	though my mind could think i still was a madman

Sam sits on the edge of the bed, his fingers curled around one another, tangled and indistinguishable. His right thumb carefully touches the center of his left palm, strained and shaking slightly. He's tired, eyes heavy and dark with sins that he cast upon himself, his limbs weighed down as if tied to stone. Outside his room, (his white, bleached room with confining, maggot-covered walls that crash down on him again and again and-) there's a loud shout followed by a harsh yell, a thump, and forced, uncomfortable silence. Sam breathes in, breathes out, and almost chokes on the putrid air of madness. 

It's nice, in some way. Soothing.

Lucifer seems to think so, at least. He smiles at Sam, teeth sharp and bright. "I wonder," he says, leaning close to Sam's ear, "how long it will take for you to-" and he conjures up a piece of kindling, "-break." The wood snaps into two, the sharp crack echoing in the dim room, though it shouldn't, couldn't. "Mmmm," Lucifer hums. "Perhaps it's already happened. You know, big brother believes you're already gone. Past saving. Maybe you've never been whole. Not since - when was it? Not since 'ol Yellow Eyes put his blood in you. Drip, drip. Like the tinkling of church bells." 

Lucifer laughs, a bright, high, clear sound that does, horrifically, sound like church bells. Sam flinches.

"Y'know what I think?" Lucifer asks. He plays with a cockroach, stepping on it, cornering it, playing with it. A cat with a mouse. "I think you've been cursed even before that. Ever since your mommy popped you out. Cursed since birth, Sammy. What do you think about that?"

Sam doesn't really think anything. He doesn't have to. The black edges of oblivion are starting to creep up on him now, curling at the edges of his vision, lying in wait for him. If he just waits, then...

There's a knock on the door, and Lucifer beams, despite the interruption, smile too wide and teeth too shiny. "Visitors! How nice."

It's a nurse, holding Sam's medication. She's short and plump, a delicate, sympathetic air around her. She has beads in her hair the color of bone and marrow, the color of rotting skin and flesh, the color of dark yellow pus that oozes when you touch it. She seems nice enough.

"Hey, Sam," she says, all gentleness and care.

"She's afraid," Lucifer states. "She thinks you're going to lash out at her or attack her. And really, why wouldn't you? Would be fitting for someone like you."

"It's time to take your medicine." 

Sam gets up slowly, lacking the energy to do much else, and he unfolds like an accordion, joints creaking like he's much, much older than he is. "Thanks," he says gratefully, and he means it. He's glad she's here to help people, even if he's not one of the people she can help. As Sam swallows the pills, he can't help but feel a small spark of hope that they might work.

By the time the nurse leaves, he's already on the bed, wishing, praying that the drugs would take effect. Lucifer is oddly quiet. Sam's eyes close, tired and finally ready to get the rest they deserve. He thinks that for once, maybe the world isn't out to get him. He drifts off to-

Lucifer presses against him, cold and unyielding, _devilish_. "Not yet, Sammy," he purrs. "We can have a nap later." He curls a cold, smooth hand around Sam's arm.

Sam screams.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't resist the title. Sue me.   
> Prompt for this: wrongful.


End file.
